The Dragon's Den

My triumphant Return to the Skies

2006-04-25T18:01:00.000-07:00

It's an older picture, from January 2005- my last flight at Gilenkirchen NATO Air Base. Last week, imagine me in this pose, but with a big 'ol shit eating grin. For 8.4 hours. Thats right, my first flight in 15 months. A lot of people said it would never happen. A lot more couldn't understand why. It's hard to say. Maybe it's because of these pictures.

The one on the right is from Alaska. Thats the glacier on Mt. McKinley, Denali National Park from about 18,000 feet.

Maybe it's this picture. Sure, you only see a couple guys around the jet, but it takes an incredible amount of teamwork to not only get that aircraft into the air, but to perform a mission effectively and safely, bringing everyone home every time. And I'm a part of that. My desk is 29,000 feet with a view most would die for.

Yes, there are times I shout out at myself "Why the hell am I doing this?!?!", or when we're only 200 AGL on a difficult approach with heavy rains and strong crosswinds, and the pilot is getting too slow on the airspeed and the stall warning system goes off... Or the time we hit windshear and bounced on the runway, then blew through a formation of F-15's that where in the visual pattern...

The sights I've seen... the people I've met... the things I have done. I really feel like I belong here, in the air, doing what I do best. If there is such a thing as reincarnation, I want to come back as a bird.

The Sky is Green and the Grass is Blue

2006-04-03T20:34:00.000-07:00

In a remarkable turn of events, my Aeronautical Orders finally got straightend out. Although I was a bit miffed that they had basicly been sitting on someone's deck at the Flight Management Office for about a week. Seems the woman that handles them was on vacation, and my orders where at the bottom of a very large pile of paperwork that her office was saving up for her until she returned. I had to use my Jedi Powers and Mind Trick a Staff Sergeant into processing the orders so I could get back to flying. I'm scheduled to fly on the 19th of April. Woot!

In ANOTHER strange turn of events, someone near and dear to me broke up with her live in boyfriend. I was strangly detached from the entire situation. As a matter of fact, I don't think I really want to touch the entire situation with a 10' pole. HOWEVER, being the "Charlie Brown" kinda guy that I am, I'll be there for her. What a strange, twisted world my love life is. I suxor.

Spent the entire day on Saturday immersed in World of Warcraft. Wasn't my intention, but it happened anyways. I wanted to paint and play Warmachine at the local game store. In an unexpected gesture, I was offered one of my Guild's coveted spots on a Molten Core raid. How could I refuse? I went along and had a good time, and picked up my first piece of Tier 1 armor- Lawbringer Boots. After that, we ran on over and killed Onyxia. After THAT, we killed another dragon named Ysondra. Was a good day of raiding and I finished Saturday without hardly stepping foot outside.

So when Sunday rolled around, I was feeling a tad guilty. I was supposed to go to the 30th Annual Medeval Fair down in Norman, Oklahoma. One of my roommates was at his Sunday Morning Cult meeting, and the other was still in bed. So I pulled an OKC White Trash move and sat outside in the sunshine in my PJ's and slippers, sipping on coffee, and making a bunch of phone calls to friends. One finally convinced me to goto the Medeval Fair, and I'm glad I did. Had a good time. It's fun to see all the people in costume, and the singing and play-swordfights/jousts. It's a pretty big deal, and one of the few things I missed about OKC.

A C-5 Galaxy crashed today during an Emergency Return to Dover AFB. EVERYONE onboard (17 souls!) survived with light injuries! We talked about it for a bit at work. Was remarkable that no one died. I hope something like that never happens to me. Knock on wood!

Life seems to be going well for me. And I'm pretty happy about it. Why is the sky Green and the grass blue? Just seems that everything is upside down, but in a good way.

Promotion Testing

2006-03-22T17:32:00.000-08:00

Tomarrow I get to face the Yearly Ritual of Promotion in the Air Force. For many, it is the beginning of Passover. A state of being in which one is full of hope and optimissum until the results of the Weighed Airman Promotion System. In a cynical and often cruel ceremony, the Squadron Commander gets notified of anyone under his/her/it's command that will be promoted the day before the actual results are published to the rest of the Air Force. Said Commanders will then have some kind of formation or single out said person in front of your working peers to say "Congratulations on making ! Your hard work, dedication, and motivation to the Air Force has paid off! Not only will you be getting more pay, but more responsibility and oppurtunites for your career! Everyone is proud of you!".

This of course could not be farthur from the truth, especially if it's someone that hasn't been in as long as you, and especially if you both tested during this testing cycle.

And so, they celebrate passover by gathering the other "losers" and drinking large quantities of beer. The "Winners" go off and celebrate as well- but the "Losers" usually don't go along.

This year, I'm going to be a looser. I just haven't studied enough- or enough to make me doubt the outcome. Yes, this year, I won't be making another stripe. There is always next year.

Another Day, Another.... ?

2006-03-14T19:04:00.000-08:00

Yeah, I totally agree with this picture. I faced one or two of them today.

I'm still not flying yet. Erg. Soon, I hope.

I saw this today, and well, it was just sad. And funny too. In a very sick, twisted sort of way. I'm going to hell for sure. Check it out. http://www.cnn.com/2006/US/03/14/beauty.queen.death.ap/index.html

"Miss Deaf Texas Struck by Train, Killed" reads the headline. She apearently was walking too close to some railroad tracks, and, well, didn't hear the train.

OK, moving on. Went to the zoo the other day and had a great time. My favorite animal?

Pretty, eh? Didn't get to see any lions. Well, not completely true. I got to see the top of ones ears- they where hiding. No Wolves either. However, as zoo's go, it was still pretty impresive. Score one for OKC!

What else? Nodda. Trying to get motavated to paint. Ugh. I like to paint, I want to paint, I just... can't. Blah.

Onward!

Sometimes, it's just hard to update...

2006-03-02T19:13:00.000-08:00

Yup- thats me.

Good Stuff: I got my stuff delievered to my friends' house, and am now sleeping on a bed again. Feels Fraking Great!

Work is going very well- I spent just about my entire day posting changes to my Flight Manual- 13 of them!!! Oh My Gawd! First off, the Flight Manual is about 1300 pages. Each change had about 100 pages to change. You have to start sequentialy, that is, the basic Tech Order first. Then Change one- remove the "bad" pages, and replace with the "Good" pages. Took me about 6 hours to do the whole thing. Tomarrow, I get to bump it against the index to see if I got all the Changes correct (called 'A' Paging). Busy work in the extreme, but ya know what? I loved every minute of it.

Started my Iron Kingdoms d20 Campaign "Witchfire Trilogy". fun stuff. Of course, all my players have pre-rolled an additional 3-5 characters. I seem to rack up the PK's when I DM. >:)

I've also started playing Mechwarrior- Click, click, boom as my friends call it.

Yeah, it's Clickytech, but it has a few things going for it. No assembly, no painting, pull it from the box and start playing. It's also pretty much a no brainer to play- or at least it was. It's gotten a little more complicated since I first started playing. Still, it's a beer and pretzles kinda game.

How are ya liking the pictures? I've deceided to start jazzing things up a bit around here.

Have you been keeping up with BSG? Apollo is now the Commander of "The Beast"- and their isn't a better person in the fleet for it! Kinda throws my earlier predictions off a bit about the Pegasus getting blown up, eh? I mean, they can't kill Apollo off, can they? Of concern to me now though is the previews of the season finale- the Chief looks like crap, and in one scene, someone dressed in the orange Ground Crew coveralls is taking a swan dive off a high rail. Come on Chief! Buck up! It'll be all right, just stick with it...

OK, thats all for today. Oh yeah, a few links to check out:

http://www.chairforce.com

http://rrrrrrrrrrrrrnnnnnnnnnnhhhh.blogspot.com/

Enjoy!

A Good Day

2006-02-21T17:09:00.000-08:00

Have you ever had one of those days where just everything worked out? That things just "Went Your Way"? How about a day when you felt like you could do no wrong?

Today was one of those days for me. It's funny how often I would wear BDU's to work instead of a Flight Suit when I had office duty. Then for a year I wasn't allowed to wear a Flight Suit. Today, I did. It's funny how wearing a "Plastic Bag" can alter the way you feel about yourself. Or maybe it was the Leather Jacket and all the prestige that goes with it. I dunno. It just felt FRAKING GREAT to be wearing a Flight Suit and my Leather Jacket.

The day started blah. Grey overcast day, cold, got up late. What a way to start the day. Went to the BX, got a cup of mocha java, then sat down in the Barber Shop. Wasn't expecting much- I just never get a good haircut. Today, I got a kick-arse haircut! Perfect IMHO. I then did a quick walkthru of the BX and heard a guy excitedly talking on his cell phone-

"Dude! They just got eight of 'em in! Three are already gone! Hurry!"

So, I wondered over to the Video Game section to see what the fuss was about. Found a couple salespeople and others standing about.

"And low and behold! Holy Flourescent light shine'ed down upon low. Yeah, did the Circle of Red Coats surround the alter and chant in low tones. The Green robed worshippers hath also gathered around. For there laying low was the Green and White box of the house of Microsoft, father of Xbox that beget THE XBOX 360 !!! "

The item I waited in line for FOUR HOURS in freezing snow weather outside a Best Buy in the Gawd Forsaken Hours of Pre-dawn back in November. /dance

Ok, so the ol' Credit Card took a hit today. :)

From there, it was on to the Squadron, where I was surrounded by people that just had a purpose, and knew what had to be done. It just doesn't get any better than that for me. I actually got to talk shop with some old buddies, and I'm really looking forward to the future.

Hope is a powerful thing.

On to that other thing I edited from the records. Expectations. /Bah

Found a place to live- but an apartment won't be available until sometime after May. So I'm throwing some of my stuff in storage and staying with some friends. Good times.

I'm starting a Iron Kingdoms campaign for my old gaming group. And getting into a Warmachine group, and Mechwarrior. Good times ahead!

Expectations

2006-02-10T23:05:00.000-08:00

First off, I made it to OKC just fine. Woot. The ol' Jeep isn't quite as fast as my Mustang- so I was getting passed a lot. It's also a bit more thirsty. Oh, and if you ever drive into Casper, Wyomig, DO NOT stay at the Motel 6 just off the highway at the second exit. It SUXOR BAD. Took three days to get here. I stopped the second night in Salina, KS. Pronounced Sol-on-a. Don't know why, won't know how, but there ya go. Sorry for saying Salina at the Chili's there folks. It's all good.

Second, in World of Warcraft, my Guild Quixotic finally took down the dragon Onyxia and I got my fancy new, BFS- thats Big Fraking Sword to you uninitiated into the wonderful world of MMORPGs. I was very happy, and fell asleep dreaming happy thought.

Third, I reported for duty today. Saw some people I knew from a long time ago (2002! LOL). We worked a little bit on a plan to get me up and flying again- but for the most part, they said "Take care of your stuff, and when your done, come back and tell us your ready to fly". I think I can do that. Gotta find a place to live first. I really want to move into a house- but from my limited search so far, the houses around the base are... ghetto. Or at least the ones for rent. Looks like apartment living for me once again. :(

Now for the meat of the post. Expectations.

A GREAT DEAL OF THIS POST HAS BEEN EDITED BY ME. SORRY, BUT SOMETIMES, YOU CAN GET A LITTLE TOO PERSONAL.

-->twist and pivot my perception of reality a bit if you please<-- LIFE GOES ON

---Maybe someday I will explain why that phrase has a special meaning to me---

What really scares me is that I think I still love her. :(

The Hotel Life

2006-01-29T20:45:00.000-08:00

Well, the packers came, they boxed all my stuff up, and then loaded it all in a truck. Joy. My apartment that seemed so small and cramped with all my stuff in it, suddenly seems way, way too large and empty. I started getting all sentamental about it, then realized "Hey, you only lived here for 10 months! You spent more time in a tent in the frickin' Cat Liter box of the Middle East then here. What's the big deal?"

So I handed over my keys and with only one backward glance, closed the door. Kinda felt like I was closing the door on a chapter of my life or something.

The Air Force, being the great institution that it is, is supposed to have ample billeting space for people moving into and out of a base. Well, base billeting is full. In true Air Force fashion that sets us apart from the other services, they handed me a "Non-availability Letter" and a "Temporary Lodging Expense Letter" and kicked me off base. I asked,
"Where can I go?" And they said,
"Anywhere. Just be sure to use your Governement Credit Card,".
So here I am in the Hilton Garden Inn outside Spokane International Airport. I gotta say, it's pretty swank. Not as good as some I've been in, but pretty close. Free High Speed Internet. Always worth an extra star or two in my book. But as much as the Air Force is paying me for the hotel, it doesn't *quite* cover all the expenses. So, tomarrow, I'll be moving over to my half-sister's house in Couer d'Alene. It's 48 miles away from the base, but hey, it's free. And it's only for a week, until after the Superbowl.

Oh yeah GO SEATTLE SEAHAWKS!

I went to work friday. Yeah, I know. Anyways, the point is, sitting out on the ramp was 79-1675 (I think it's 79...). An aircraft I flew on many, many times logging lots of hours. Oh- it was an E3C AWACS. Seems they came in a couple days before for some off station training. Seems kinda like a sign or something, eh?

I called down to Tinker a few weeks ago just to find out whats up and all that. At first, they just assumed I was a new Flight Engineer and they where just gonna throw me into the Student Pipeline- ugh. Well, I got transfered over to the Student Registators Office, and talked to the civilian woman in charge of schedules. Well, after I mentioned I had been at Geilenkirchen as an Instructor FE, her whole demenor changed. Now I'm going VFR Direct to one of the Flying Squadrons where they will give me whatever training as needed. Much better then being a "Student". She even asked which squadron I would like to go to. I can hardly wait.

I'm fighting a nasty headcold. Thank goodness for Nyquil.

As much as I like the hotel life, I'll be glad when I have a place to call "home" again.

Moving Day!

2006-01-23T07:27:00.000-08:00

The moving company will be arriving sometime today to pack my stuff and load it up into a truck for shipment to my next base. It's hard to believe I've been here for a year. I have a lot of mixed feelings about it. The guys over at [URL=http://www.idahogamershaven.com/html/modules/news/] Gamer's Haven [/URL] gave me a little shindig going away. Had a cake, even a funny card full of McDonalds Gift Certificates for the drive down... EVERY town has a McDonalds it seems. One of the best game stores I've ever had the pleasure of being in- and I think it was all because of the owner Bob. I doubt I could ever be as cool as him. If I ever own my own shop, he'll be my inspiration.

Seeing that the Seatle Seahawks are going to Super Bowl XL, I'm delaying my departure for a week. I'd rather watch the game up here in the Northwest surrounded by Seahawks fans then in Oklahoma where it's all about Dallas (boo! Hiss!). I also have to scrounge up a Seahawks jersey. Funny how football has that kinda effect, eh?

Got [URL=http://wow.allakhazam.com/item.html?witem=18348] Quel'Serrar [/URL] last week in WoW. Or at least, the book that leads to getting "The High Blade". Now all I have to do is go kill a[URL=http://wow.allakhazam.com/db/mob.html?wmob=10184] Dragon [/URL]. Easy, right? Only if your in a high end raiding Guild, and I ain't. Oh well. I just want this thing to piss off all the Warriors in WoW. "What's a Paladin doing with that sword?!?! OMG! You Suxor! Thats such a Warrior's weapon! I H8 U!!!" :)

I soooo called the plot for BSG last week. Although I didn't see Baltar handing over a Nuclear Warhead over to that Cylon Gina (?). I guess we now know how the Pegasus is going to be written out of the script, eh? Sharon and Helo's baby not having any antigenes and curing cancer... thats kind of frightening. What will they do now? Is their baby the next step in evolution? Is Baltar a Cylon himself? Will Starbuck and Apollo ever hook up? Can Adama get over his hatred of the Cylons? They still owe us a kick ass Space Battle. While the to Battlestars' kicking the Cylon Base ships was just awesome, it was way, way to short and just lacked the intensity of the other space battles. As I said earlier, if they where gamers, they would let the Galactica ferry the fleet to Earth, and the Pegasus would go on full Combat Operations against the Cylons for nuking Caprica (They're gonna pay for messing up our home!!!). Oh yeah, and every Viper would be getting converted over to Black Birds with FTL drives- after all the Raiders they have destroyed, they should have a few FTL drives around...

All righty then! Until next time, I'm outta here.

A new year fresh with new possibilities

2006-01-13T23:45:00.000-08:00

It's a new year, and I am looking forward to it. I'm still dealing with the twitches of emotion from my time at Fairchild, the death of my Father, and my future. Even after all the bad things that happened, and I know I have spent countless time on it, I just want to list all the good things that happened this year.

1). A new appreciation for my career and the Air Force
2). My gaming buddies at Gamer's Haven
3). A new, better way of looking at life
4). The chance to set things right with my dad
5). To meet my best friend's newborn son, Gavin----> "Uncle Tommy" :)

So long 2005. I laughed, I cried, and in the end, I applauded. Golf clap. Hello 2006! Your looking very sexy. Can I buy you a drink?

OK. So, what have I been doing? I've been waiting for BSG like a dog too long left out in the cold, pawing at the door to get in. So far, the first two episodes have not disappointed me. Except in the second one- where the frack was the space battle???? I demand a kick ass, take no prisoners, hour long Viper Frag Fest. Apollo, flying the most manuverable craft in the fleet, gets taken out by space debris. SPACE DEBRIS!! Like someone flushed the toilet on board the Galactica and a hunk of blue stuff floated out into space, and BAM! Yeah, right. I know they had to set it up for the whole Apollo Angst plot line, but it could have been better, like he took a hit meant for Starbuck or something. Grrrrr.

Warmachine continues apace- here's a preview pic:

Say hello to Alexia. A young woman with a few extra souls and a Necromatic blade. She is not crazy, she is just misunderstood.

I also finished my Cygnar box set, so I can now apply to be a Press Ganger, and OKC doesn't have one. I also finally put together the Behemoth and, well, it's big. Really big. Picks of that later when I get it painted.

I found my next car. It'll be available probably in 2008.

Yup- Dodge brought it back. The Challenger. 6.1L V-8. Vroom Vroom! And unlike the thrown together, "Trying too hard to be Modern Retro like the Mustang" Camero, this one has actually been under development for over a year, and is more of a pre-production car then concept. How close are they to building it? Well, several car mags have gotten a hands on driving experience, and dodge drove the car on stage at the Detroit Auto Show. The Chevy Camero? Wasn't drivable. :)

underworld:Evolution is out in a week or so, and I'm stoked about it. Kate Beckinsale in skin tight black leather with dual guns... shiver.

So- how about those Seahawks??? I'm hoping it'll be the Seahawks and the Colts at the superbly. I doubt if the Seahawks would win, but ya know what? It's been a long, long time since they got this far, and to go all the way to the Superbowl would be an accomplishment in itself.

I made a new investment in "Self Protection" exercising my Second Amendment right to bear arms. This is one of the newest .45 ACP pistols from Kimber America. It's dead sexy, accurate, and perfect for shooting peo... I mean "Home Defense". As the Sales Rep at the gun store said, "You have good taste. Expensive taste, but very good taste".

So, here's to the New Year. Instead of sitting back and letting it happen, I think I'm gonna go out and grab it.

The Dragon's Den

2005-12-25T16:55:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas!!

A small update

2005-12-03T11:43:00.000-08:00

Here are some highlights.

I've played in no less than FOUR huge Warhammer 40K Tournaments in the last month. So far, I've taken Best Army, Best Painted Army, and just can't seem to break into Best Overall.

I celebrated my 34th Birthday- damn I'm getting old. On the upside, I went out on a fantastic date with a wonderful woman... who I will soon be leaving. :( I have earned the respect and admiration of my half sister and brother-in-law (who is fantasticly rich and all that).

Turkey Day was good- spent it with my half sis. Ate a lot of Turkey, and was entertained by the classest woman I have ever known- it's Brad's Mother, and she is in her 70's. She grew up upper, upper class, and just really has a ton of... class. Just a great hostess. She can really put on a great party. I can't say enough nice things about her. Everyone should know someone like this.

The Couer d' Alene Festival of Lights parade was the day after Thanksgiving and is a HUGE event in CDA. A little over 30,000 people showed up to see the local parade, watch the fireworks over the lake, and the annual lighting of the Coeur d' Alene Christmas Tree. I haven't seen it since 1992 when I flew my (then) Girlfriend up from Florida to see it. It's grown a bit, and I still love it.

I bought a Jeep Wrangler- 1997 Sahara, green with a Tan Hardtop. Drives like a brick, tops out at about 75. Has big oversized tires and a lift kit. It's almost exactly the opposite of my '03 Cobra, and I love it. I don't know why, but I love it.

It's been snowing a lot the last couple days- and I love the snow. I'm happy I bought the Jeep though- four wheel drive is great! I also bought a new Ski Jacket, and will be going skiing in the very near future (sometime next week...).

I re-enlisted for another 4 years, I kinda had to for my Orders to Tinker. So this will take me out to December, 2011. I'll be eligible to retire in March 2011. Still don't know what I want to do when I retire, but the Coffee Shop thing in Seattle gets more and more apealing every day. See, I can serve coffee all day long, and then on Friday nights, close early and play D&D all night long with my friends... sounds perfect if you ask me. Anyways, I'll be retiring at the age of 39. I'll still have to get another job (Military Retirement isn't THAT much...), but the difference is I'll be able to pick and choose just about any job and still be able to make a living (Welcome to Walmart... ).

I'm starting my outprocessing from Fairchild, and as expected, it's painfull and full of BS, but for some reason it just isn't bothering me all that much. I guess the idea of leaving just kind of over rides everything. :) Seems I have made another enemy in my Air Force Career. A certain Command Chief Master Sergeant here at Fairchild (New Air Force position- think of it as an E-10, although E-9 is the highest you can go). What I don't understand is why he is so pissed at me, and why he feels the need to get involved in my life now, just when things are getting back on track. Where was he six months ago when I really, really needed help? Anyways, I think he tried to cockblock my orders and return me to the Command Post but got shot down from some blessed power on high. Of course that pissed him off even more. One thing after another, and one day at a time. Deep breath! Deep Breath!

I tried in vain to get an XBox 360- waited a couple hours in line for one and missed out. Which was probably a good thing, as there really isn't any games that catch my eye yet. I'm just more interested in hooking it up to my HDTV and playing Halo 2 on it.

So, there ya have it. I'm looking at maybe building a new computer as a combo Birthday/Chirstmas gift for myself. It's gonna scream I think. Oh yeah, I'm also throwing around the idea of another Tattoo...

The Future or "Flyingtam, please report to the carousel"

2005-10-29T09:22:00.000-07:00

I finally got an assignment rip- looks like the Black Hole has caught me in it's gravety well. I didn't really believe people when they said "Once your in the E3 world, you'll never leave". As a Flight Engineer, I can go to a TON of bases and different airframes. So where am I going?

TINKER AIR FORCE BASE, Oklahoma.

Report No Later Than Date of 28 February. I asked if I could leave early and was denied. Earliest I can leave is Jan 27th. Thats OK- I now have some definite date of when this chapter of my life will close, and I'll be very happy when I turn that particular page. Looks like I bought my Jeep Wrangler just in time. It's gonna be real fun driving across the mountains in the middle of winter.

Yup, the place I loved to loathe back in 1997-2002. Oh well. On a positive side, training won't be so bad. A little classroom work, quick requalification in the Sim, and I'll be back to flying.

Got my old gaming group down there too- and as dysfunctional as we sometimes where, it was the best I've been in! Already got an RSVP invite at the old table. That will kick ass!

Found out there isn't much of a Warmachine following down there. So I'll have to fix that. Maybe becoming a Press Ganger will help. Speaking of Warmachine, the big tournament is tomarrow, and I have to work 12 hours today. :/ Guess what I'll be doing? Painting my zombies! "Braaaaainzzzz". I'm really looking forward to this! Should be a blast!

WoW happenings- I've started to play in the Battlegrounds, which is Player vs. Player combat with Capture the Flag elements to it. It's a blast! I really like it! I never thought it could be so fun! Of course, I really suck at it with no experience, but I'm getting better. I kill about as many players as deaths for me- like about 5-10 in a half hour period. Still trying to get into some of the other instances, but I have come to realize that some people just really, really suck in WoW.

Blizzcon is this weekend, and reports have already been spilling out about the new Expansion- The Scarlet Crusade. The level cap is going up to 70 (boo, hiss, boo), some new spells, talents, dungeons, quests, etc. Whats really got me stocked is the new Horde race- the Blood Elves. Basicly, High Elves who have become so addicted to magic that all they do is quest for their next "fix". Not really evil, but not really good either. So looks like I'll be playing Horde when the expansion comes out- whenever that may be. No word on the Aliiance race yet. I guess the rumor of Gaint Panda's didnt' go over so well and Blizz scrapped it at the last minute in favor of something else.

I was the Master of Ceremonies for a Community College of the Air Force Graduation on Thursday. I thought I did an OK job, but every there said I did an awesome job! An E-9 shook my hand and gave me a "You Made a Difference" Chief's coin- pretty big honor in my opinion!

It's been an eventfull week and a very good week for me. I'm gonna be taking pictures at the Warmachine Tournament, so I'll post some later.

Happy Halloween everyone!

Another Week...

2005-10-22T10:59:00.000-07:00

...has come and gone. What where the hi-lites? Well, I played way too much World of Warcraft (hereafter referred to as WoW). Made a Warlock, got to level 10. Made a Rogue, got to level 6. My Paladin got a sweet pair of Greaves friday night after killing The Baron in Stratholme- Lightforge Legplates. I'm VERY happy.

I SHOULD have been painting Warmachine stuff for the Warmachine tournament I'm running October 30th. I still have two Headless Horseman, five Warpwolves, and 20 Zombies (braaaainzzzzz) to paint. Ugh.

I've had this huge itch to play D&D lately, but I just can't find a group I'm happy with.

On the Military Front, I passed my Air Force FIT test. Gut measurement, sit ups, push ups, and a mile and a half run. Still not anything like the Army, but it's a heck of a lot better (or worse) then the old test. Passing is a score of 75. I made it with 75.5. :) Good to Go for another year.

Rumblings from the mountain seem to indicate that I'll be returning to Tinker AFB, Oklahoma in January. On one hand, I'm thrilled to be flying again, and on an airframe I'm familar with. But it's in Oklahoma. On the other hand, staying here at Fairchild and flying Helo's was very appealing. Not like I have much choice. The important thing is no matter where I go, I'll be flying.

On to more important things:

Batman Begins DVD: Love it
Privateer Press pushing back there release schedule: Sucks
My new boots: Hurt
My new Jeep: Different

Until next time- wage war against Humanity- the Aliens don't think we're worth it.

The Here and Now

2005-10-12T20:26:00.000-07:00

So it's been a while. Shoot me. A lot has happened since then.

Lets see now...

I got fired from my Job at the Command Post. Yes, it does happen in the Air Force.

I broke my hand on the desk of the Major in charge of the Command Post.

His desk was pure evil and had to be destroyed. Sadly, I was not up to the task at hand. Get it? Task at hand? Onward...

My AFSC (job "code" in the Air Force; MOS in the other branches) has been changed back to Flight Engineer.

The Flight Engineer Functional Manager for my Career Field went to bat for me at a very high level and managed to pull me out of the Command Post.

I'm still at Fairchild, but I'm awaiting PCS orders to go back to flying.

What have I learned? Faith, and belief in others is a powerful thing, especially when your being told by others that "You'll never fly again".

So I've been taking life pretty much one day at a time since late August. While I do feel some... trepidition? about the future, living one day at a time gives me a very different perspective on life. Looking forward to the future has always been my thing, so much so that I tend to forget whats going on around me in the here and now. I've found myself incredibly focused and energetic.

The trick now is to just keep living one day at a time and focus on the Here and Now.

Other News: Finally made level 60 with my Paladin in WoW. :) Finished the latest Harry Potter book- I didn't like it. Felt like it was too forced, and like it was two different people writting it. Started painting miniatures again- working on a couple for a good friend back in Oklahoma. Bought a 1999 Jeep Wrangler Sahara. It's Green/Tan hardtop, 5-speed, liftkit, some suspension work, big tires... oh yeah! I've started calling it a 'Rig'. My North Idaho Heritage is starting to show. Don't worry, I still have Serenity- all 500hp of her.

A new Game Store opened up here in Spokane- Warsmith. I know the owner and he's a pretty decent guy. I've applied to become a Press Ganger for Privateer Press- makers of Iron Kingdoms and Warmachine. I like the game a whole lot better than Warhammer- better rules and mini's.

What else? Oh yeah- Serenity is the movie to see. I loved it! Surprisingly good. Really good. I look forward to the next movie.

Until next time...

Gencon...HO!

2005-08-15T19:28:00.000-07:00

Yup- the final hurtle has been... hurtled? Yeah, anyways. My leave paperwork got signed today by my Commander. I had a little panic sesson today when I found out the digital Leave Request System, known as Leaveweb, had NOT forwarded my request. Seems it got lost somewhere in the great, vast network wasteland known as the DoD/US Air Force Intercommunication Network. After briefly speaking with my Commander (who is an OK officer so far in my book- but then again he is new) and discussing the new, Paperless Air Force and how easy it was back in Caveman days when we used thinly sliced paper and blue or black ink to fill out leave requests, he signed my paperwork. No joke- my AF FORM 988, SEP 91(Previous Edition Obsolete) says //SIGNED// under the Supervisor's Signature block. Now, I'm a pretty honest guy and all, but just how hard would it be to forge //SIGNED// in a New Times Roman font? It's tempting... I've gotten out of a lot of tickets by waving my ID Card and Leave Form, and gotten into a lot of places for free using the same method. My Commander shook my hand, wished me a good leave and then dismissed me. Hey, he is new afterall.

After being dismissed, I went to the Squadron Administrative Sergeant who handed me a PAPER COPY of my leave form. She also had two more copies- one for my Section Admin, and one for the Squadron Admin. So much for the Paperless Air Force, eh?

Looks like I'll be meeting up with the rest of the guys at the hotel Wednesday night. I can't wait. :)

A Gamers Pair-a-dice

2005-08-08T10:19:00.000-07:00

As may have been noticed, I haven't posted anything for a while. I apologize for this. My life has changed a lot (again) since my last post- Numb. As my life gets a little more stabilized, I'm able to write more about it.

In just a few more days, me and about 20,000 other Nerds, Geeks, and Gamers will converge on the gaming mecca of the world- Gencon. FYI, I'm a GAMER, that is, I have a job, I don't live in my parents basement, I value personal hygene, and while gaming is a big part of my life, it's not the only thing in my life.

So, for four days, I'll be hooking up with friends from all over the US, meeting industry movers and shakers, seeing new and upcoming game releases, talking in Geek Speak, and, oh yeah, gaming. I'll get very little sleep, I'll spend way too much money, and I'll have a blast. THIS is my vacation, and I love it. This is year number seven for me.

I'm probably gonna be a "Booth Parasite" this year at the Privateer Booth- Warmachine is my current Fav Game. I'm getting my Khador force painted and worked out. I'll post pictures later this week. I'm in Warmachine Worlds, though I doubt I'll make it past the first round. :) The old D&D books are getting a breeze through to refresh my memory. The Steel Wolves led by Annastaisa Kerensky will be storming their 'Mechs across the battlefield in the Mechwarrior Tournaments. The mighty Pirate fleet of the American Revolution will be sailing into a few bays, hoping to get some free booty. I'll attend a few workshops, probably a paint-n-take, shake hands and get some books autographed, and in general, have a great time.

Breathing

2005-08-08T09:59:00.000-07:00

Seems that throughout my life, certain songs seem to resonate within me. These days, it's Anna Nalick "Breathe". The chorus seems to parallel my life-

"'Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button, girl.
So cradle your head in your hands
And breathe... just breathe,"

Being in the Air Force, my life is not my own sometimes. It feels like I'm in a cable car going over some huge frickin' mountains. Right now, I'm in a pretty deep canyon with another huge mountain coming up; I can't see anything along the sides and all I can see is this huge, insurmountable obsticle in front of me.

I was a really, really good Flight Engineer. Not the best, but far from the worst. I never thought I would miss flying so much. Thanks to Air Force Politics (yes, even the military has politics) and a beaucracy one step from being out of control, my return to flying is in limbo. Like an Hour Glass glued to a table, the sand is running out, and I can't turn it over.

My father finally passed away on June 19th. He was in a lot of pain, and I was there for most of it the last few days. It was a Life Experience, worthy of it's own chapter in my Life Book. I think this Life Chapter will be divided in two- one for my father, and one for my Career. They will be written as two very different chapters, ignoring the aspect of the other. It's difficult to explain, but you'll get what I mean someday. Both are just too important to me not to get my full attention.

I can't go back to Novemeber '04, when I made the request to come home for my father. I now regret it. I hate regret. I try to live my life without as much regret as I can, and yet I find my life full of it. Regret that is. Anyways, like the song says, I can't find the rewind button.

Life Goes On, and all I can do now is BREATHE.

Numb

2005-06-17T15:36:00.000-07:00

I had typed this huge post on my current situation in my life. However, I think I like this version better.

My father has cancer, I made a huge carrer change to be here for him (and it sucks, oh my God does it suck), and I am feeling very numb.

Perhaps the grief will hit me later. Maybe it never will. I look at my Father and just see a man I hardly ever knew who is dying, and that sucks for him, and my aunt, and step mother. For me- maybe if he had been around more. Maybe if I had made the effort to get to know him better. I don't know. Is this regret? No, I have nothing but remorse and regret for the price I paid to come here and what it has done to my military career. I look upon my father, and try to remember him as everyone else has, but I have no real memories of what he was like in the first place. I feel sorrow for him now, for he is in a great deal of pain, and yet he continues to live. I want him to die, not out of any vindication or revenge, but just so his pain and suffering will end. And I can get back to my life and dreams. A life that never really included my Father, nor any dreams shared with him.

I have shared this story with others, and they all say I need to make peace with my Father. Peace? For what? HE WAS NEVER THERE FOR ME. I don't know the man. If my being here brings him some small comfort, then so be it. I will be there for him. It's just brutal to hear the stories about the hunting trips, the camping trips, the fishing trips, the "Remember the time we did this?"- those are the stories I should have of my father. Instead I nod, keeping my rage to myself, swallowing my pride, and help those around me with their grief.

Now, everyone asks me "How can you be so strong?". I am not strong. I am just... numb.

There is always a beginning...

2005-06-16T12:05:00.000-07:00

So! Here it is. I've jumped on the Bandwagon. I'm officially a Blogger. As my first official post, I shall outline just what the heck I'm expecting to get out of this and why I'm doing it.

Last question first. Why am I doing it? There is a need for me to get stuff out of my head. Comments on my life- those little thoughts that I keep to myself. Also, all the kewl people have blogs, and I want to be kewl. :)

What am I expecting to get out of this? Vindication. Pure and simple.

So without furthur ado, here is my thoughts on Life, the Universe, and Everything in it.